Saturday, December 23, 2006

So Here It Is...

Pretty much, anyway.

Yesterday was the last official day at work for a goodly while (though, of course, as I am in residence in the house, I am still on duty throughout the festive season) and to celebrate we held a little lunch time gathering.

I left a poster pinned to the filing cabinet in the main office, inviting everyone along for an end of term mince-pie-and-wine-fest, knowing that it was unlikely the majority would bother. Some people prefer to spend their last few days before Christmas doing some shopping, or travelling, or even sorting out a few last minute bits of work before they leave for the week. To me, resisting the offer of free food and drink is unfathomable. Still, I always invite everyone, as I am a sociable sort.

As usual, only McColleague and Lovely Warden turned up, which was fine, as that was who I had expected and catered for. Darling Daughter and Young Warden were also in attendance, but as they live here they had limited choice. Not that they would turn down the offer of food and drink, being so young and voracious.

I piled the table high with mince pies, and, as predicted, there they remained, untouched. The mince pies are now for decorative purposes only it seems. The wine went very well though. So well we decided it would be a Good Idea to melt a whole camembert to make fondue. Which, actually, was a pretty good idea, even in the cold light of sobriety a day later. It shouldn't have worked, yet it did. I love it when that happens.

So, here I am, pretty much ready for the whole onslaught of festivity. The turkey was delivered this morning by my Boss. He raises free range turkeys all year and then spends a frenzied couple of weeks in December getting them ready for the oven and delivered to all those who ordered one. I mentioned my Boss and his turkeys to my Best Friend earlier this week.

"Oh, right, " she said. She is very kind to all living creatures and does not eat turkeys herself. "And is he nice to his turkeys?"

"Um...well, yes, up to about a week or so before Christmas. Then he isn't as nice to them, I suppose".

Anyway, my turkey - who had a very nice time until quite recently, when he stopped having any kind of time at all - is now taking up a lot of space in the pantry (too big for the fridge). As that's the only drawback to ordering a turkey from the Boss. No matter what you ask for, what you will receive is something the size of a small dog and so heavy you have to transport it on a sack trolley. Luckily I am fond of turkey sandwiches. For a while. After a day or two I can see myself having to offload them onto anyone who strays my way. My "Excuse me..." conversations will have a twist, where I end by saying "and please accept this complimentary turkey bap and mince pie as you climb back over the gate".

8 comments:

monica said...

merry christmas, and a happy new year, Doris

if only there was some way of using up turkey and mince pie together...

Cogidubnus said...

It seems all we need here is some joined up thinking - now do bats eat Mince Pies? If so, then problem over - If not then said pies can be utilised to block bats egress from loft into Great Hall - again problem over...give me a few hours and I'll sort out the turkey too ... any left over wine problems remaining (said he in hopes) ????

Doris said...

Finest festive felicitations to you too, Monica, and thank you!

You have clearly given my problems some thought, Cogidubnus. Actually, there is a quantity of wine left over as well...what do you suggest?

Cogidubnus said...

Well I'm very experienced with alcohol - who wouldn't be after five kids, two dogs, six cats, two ducks (these are current pets only you understand)... there have been hundreds over the years...

I have a strange thought re your leftover turkey... my dear lady wife (of 20 years today, Christmas Eve), a very talented dressmaker, (including Irish Dancing dresses - note the shameless plug), recently made a ballgown for a friend - aside from payment, (which may eventually arrive later today), said friends significant other half presented us with two very odd looking fish, (allegedly these are "spurdogs") and a jar of "Tikka Massala" sauce...now if this doesn't strike you as the oddest dish possible (Spurdog Tikka Massala) what about that turkey?

Doris said...

Cogidubnus, that is surely both the most bizarre thank you gift and serving suggestion that I have ever seen.

I am hoping for simpler fare, turkey-wise. I have a huge jar of mayonnaise and a can-do attitude.

Cogidubnus said...

Belatedly, (the tummy, with the assistance of copious measures of alcohol, is still recovering), I confirm the unsuitability of Spurdog Tikka Massala as Christmas fare...how are your cans doing?

Cogidubnus said...

Help I appear to have erred - probably the result of too much alcohol yesterday (we had next door in and managed eight bottles of wine - this is disappointing in view of our previous record (ten between the four of us) but still too much for me at my advanced age and not enough today...

Some clown's given the missus a little decorative placque - it says:

"We can't BOTH look good, it's either me or the house"

For goodness sake where's her sense of humour (I only asked when the improved cleaning regime was starting)...ho hum

Doris said...

Oh my, Cogidubnus, you do like living dangerously. Spurdog Tikka Massala *and* a humourous placque for the missus! There's only so much your body can take, you know. Pace yourself!