Sunday, November 26, 2006

Love a Duck

The ducks all have their winter plumage, which means that they look particularly striking and that they are beginning to show definite signs of friskiness.

Well, "friskiness" is a bit of a euphemism. The reality is a lot more graphic and usually involves a great deal of quacking and splashing, with about seven drakes piling on top of one lone duck. They do seem to have exhibitionistic tendencies too, and always seem to save their most disturbing performances for any visitors who may be present. I mean, forget dogging. Ducking is where it's at for hardcore full-on action. Shameless.

With our Christmas events looming large, involving children’s choirs, visits to Santa’s Grotto and respectable families enjoying a traditional day out, I can safely predict the ducks will be re-enacting their orgiastic version of the last days of Pompeii every chance they get. I blame whatever’s in the water.


Will said...

That post is going to get you into a world of search-referral hurt. "Exhibitionistic orgiastic dogging hardcore full-on action", that kind of thing.

Doris said...

I envisage a great deal of disappointment for those who were searching for full-on hardcore wobbly bits car-based action. But the genuine duckers will have found their niche.

monica said...

quack quack

no one would be disappointed having stubbled over your blog, Doris

i find any group of animals at leisure are inclined to entertain my children with inappropriate back rubs...

Doris said...

Hello, Monica!

Yes, it is (another) law of nature. If you are ever stuck for a way of broaching the subject of reproduction to young children, take them on a trip to the safari park. You are guaranteed some illustrative animal antics, both entertaining and informative. Those chimps are just dirty bastards, though.

Arthur Mallard said...

Just lay off us ducks, ok? Do we come a waddling up to your bedroom when you're playing Harry Hides His Helmet? No. Also, if your visitors are fascinated by duck fucking then maybe you are hitting the wrong target audience. You need more visitors and fewer voyeurs,


Arthur Mallard.